I feel like as a girl, our first instinct when we are hurt or upset is to fight back. We want to lash out at the world & prove that we are strong because someone or something made us feel weak. I have done this many times, but it never leads to any power. I was reading my devotional & one of my favorite verses popped out at me -
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornments, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in Gods sight.”
I don’t feel my best when I am being loud & proud. I am naturally a very reserved & shy person, it’s not natural for me to be overbearing or extravagant. When I am hurting is when I feel the need to prove myself, but through that, I’ve learned that it isn’t a healing coping mechanism, at least for me. I hope that by sharing this, it allows someone that is reading to learn from my experience or at least keep it in mind when they feel like they have to do something that doesn’t exactly represent who they are.
You won’t have to act loudly for the right people. The ones that are meant to stay in your life will know & appreciate you for who you are. For example, I was at the lake recently & when I’m outside I love to lounge in the sun with my sunglasses on & just chill. One of my long time friends knows that I am like this & how quiet I am, even in social settings. People were asking if I was okay & she just reassured them that it’s how I am. It’s okay to be as you are, you don’t have to adapt to certain social settings or other people's expectations.
I can walk into a room without looking at my phone aimlessly, I can sit alone in a coffee shop, & I can go on walks alone. You don’t need people to lead your way, that is such an exhausting way to walk through life. I don’t have time for people to let me down, so when you know you can do things by yourself, it’s power. I’ve gotten to the point where I do not care what people think of me or what people are talking about when I do something. Chances are if people are talking about you, they don’t have the access to talk to you. When you have big dreams & goals you can’t let small-minded people press their beliefs on you. You’re too good for that, I promise.
When I am feeling doubtful I tell myself in my head “nope” & automatically replace that thought with something positive. I have found my ways to motivate myself & get myself out of my funks. I know this trait is a blessing because I am aware that not everyone can do this as easily as I can. I think I was given this ability to encourage other girls to find theirs.
I believe that anything is possible with practice & no excuses. A strong mindset is going to take practice. The road to success can be hard & lonely, you might intimidate people or have to cut them off. I think you will know the connections worth preserving & the ones that are draining. When you are doing out of the ordinary things, you are going to have to make sacrifices. If you want to be an average person, you’ll do average things. If you want to live an above-average life, you need to be okay doing things ordinary people aren’t willing to do. Ever since I was young, I have been very competitive, I am someone that gets the things I want regardless of the time & energy it’s going to require. My dad taught me from a young age that if I start something, I better finish it.
Everyone has the power to be inspired & motivated, you just have to find your key. My key consists of affirmations, reading self-help books, journaling, & spending time doing the things I love. I find my clarity in the things that make me feel free & happy. I am the most creative when I invest in myself & by this I mean things like going on walks, working out, & eating healthy.
My main point is that to heal, the internal reflection is much more important than the external reflection you see in your mirror. If you are looking to glow up, you need to stay in your lane, get quiet, & work on yourself. You don’t glow differently by being a pretty face, you glow differently when you start filling your cup because you will then have more substance to share with others. I pray that each & every one of you reading this has intentions of making the world a better place. Don't just sit back & watch others live your dream life, get on their level. Everyone has a purpose, if you didn’t, you wouldn’t be here. Whatever is meant for you is still out there for you to go get, & you don’t need anything but the quiet intentions that God has instilled in your heart.