The most influential people in my life have a mutual level of respect for me as I do for them. The goals of the people in my life are all very separate and individual, but we each have above average aspirations. You have to share common beliefs with the people you consider your friends because you are who you associate with. The biggest lesson I have learned from these past two years is that in order to be given the respect you deserve from the people around you, you must first respect yourself.
God did give me exactly what I prayed for that night, clarity and redirection. I had worked seven years for the moment I was living in and as much as I wanted to be there, I knew something in my heart had changed. I am not meant to be bound to a contract or people making decisions for me. Anything average is not for me and I will not settle for it. I wake up inspired by the future me, the one with a family and children, it has never been about me. One of my favorite speeches by Steve Harvey has a section where he talks about how every person is given a gift, he explained how his is his ability to make comedy out of nothing. We all have special attributes, talents and gifts. In my downtime I was re-inspired by the old me, the way she used to think, and her ability to make opportunities out of nothing despite what anyone says. This is just a reminder that even when life shuts down dreams you thought were definite, it is for a reason. When you get knocked down you have freewill to decide if you stay there or get up and figure it out. The dream is inside you, but it is up to you if you take it to your grave or bring it to fruition. That is what separates one from being average or influential.
People always want to talk about the beautiful parts of their life, but they never want to talk about the things that happen that make you want to give up on the crazy dreams in your heart. The only way to achieve greatness is to fail & learn, then get up and try again. As low as it can feel to experience true loss and defeat, it enhances the meaning of any win to come in the future. If I could look into the eyes of 14 year old me and tell her she didn’t place at Miss USA, she would be beyond broken. If she was told what she went through to get to opportunity though, she would be so proud. I used to only find contentment in my wins, but I have realized the fuel to my fire is loss, it ignites my desire to do better every single time.
Through it all, the quote “pain into power” has flashed through my mind over & over. I used to be so mad, I would walk on the treadmill blasting music looking blankly ahead of me knowing there was a reason this was all happening, I just had to stay strong. There have been so many fighting moments because when you lose sight of who you are, you lose sight of almost everything that sets your soul on fire. It’s like your mind goes into fight mode because it has to do everything it can to simply fight for you.
You will have to remove people from your life & replace them with people that align with your vision. Let go of your pride & be willing to make mistakes publicly & privately. The growth is in the moments where you feel the most vulnerable & when you learn to show all of the sides of yourself that make you so unique & so special, that is when you will be able to fully step into your authenticity & walk confidently on the path meant just for you.
If I cared what people thought I wouldn't be anything. I never craved the support of my peers, honestly, the people that wish for my downfall don’t know how much drive they give me to be even better. We all have our obstacles, so learn how to jump.
So if you’re struggling right now with anything, just know it is because you are being prepared for your next big step. There is always a bigger picture, we just aren’t able to step back and admire it until we’ve been through all of the things that make that picture what it is.
In the moment of your hardships it will be hard to redirect your vision from the negatives & realign your focus on the things that matter the most. I think that being at your lowest is often more of a blessing than people think.
As girls, it needs to be normalized to talk about big goals without being perceived as conceited or egotistical. It is so inspiring to me when I can see someone's eyes light up when they talk about the dreams they have in their heart. How can you listen to someone speak about something that sets their soul on fire & not want to encourage them?
Whatever is meant for you is still out there for you to go get, & you don’t need anything but the quiet intentions that God has instilled in your heart.
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